National Domestigraphic

Exploring The Great Indoors

First, or actually second trace of aquatic life

Written By: alb3rt - May• 01•05

As alarming as it sounds, I live beneath a shark. Referred to in French as “requiem,” a word derived from the Latin, associated with death, sharks can actually be quite pleasant, except when cajoled by Ken into attacking the unsuspecting yet then irritated midget wolf. Not a pleasant sight. Anyway, he doesn’t have a name, but he’s a very soft shark, and spends most of the time guarding the top of the couch from the smallcats. I think I’ll just call him a “couchshark,” not because of any identifying marks often associated with laying on one’s side for too long on a couch, but because of his unique not-quite-aquatic habitat.

Couchshark

Now for my second exposure to aquatic wildlife here at the indoor preserve. While exploring the bathroom, I found a specimen of a porifera which seems to have fallen from its colony high above the larger, yet most often dry watering hole. First an image of its nested colony:

Colony of Porifera

And here is the specimen itself:

Porifera Specimen

At first I was concerned it had been hurt, but when I rushed to get Ken, he assured me it was alright. He was about to return it to its colony, but with quick thinking and persuasion, he allowed me to interview it first.

Here is a transcript of the interview, with notes in brackets of things I did, but did not actually say.

ND {National Domestigraphic reporter Alb3rt}: Good morning, sir. Ma’am. Your spongeness.

Sponge: Sponge

ND: Are you alright?

Sponge: Sponge

ND: Good. I guess.

So, were you down here intentionally, or did you fall?

Sponge: Sponge

ND: Alright then, well, may I ask you to tell me about some of the places you’ve been besides the high shelf?

Sponge: Sponge

ND: Well, Ken said you might not want to talk about where you’ve been or the things you’ve seen. I’ll respect your privacy. But could you tell me why you, as marine life, are living in a higher environment than the land creatures, instead of the other way around?

Sponge: Sponge

ND: Hmmmm. Would you object to me poking you a bit? [I figured it may be more responsive to touch than purely verbal questions.]

Sponge: Sponge {squishing sound}

ND: Thank you for your response. I see there are a few of you up on the shelf. Do you plan to build a reef up there over time?

Sponge: Sponge {squishing sound}

ND: Oh. I see. Could you elaborate on that?

Sponge: Sponge {squishing sound} Sponge {more squishing sound}

ND: Well that’s great. I suppose. For a sponge, anyway.

Sponge: Sponge {hesitant squishing sound}

ND: One last thing. I noticed you have some kind of cord through you. Is this a body piercing with poriferic cultural meaning, or have you been tagged for study?

Sponge: Sponge {squishing sound}

ND: Oh. Alright. Well, thank you for your cooperation.

Sponge: Sponge {seemingly thankful squishing sound}

ND: No, thank YOU.

Well, there you have it. This might be the very first Koala-Sponge dialogue in history. I’m glad all of you reading this are there to cherish the moment with me.

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